year when I turned thirty, I had an idea that I was going to like this new decade, but at the time it was just a thought, perhaps an optimistic
wish. After all, when my mom said,
as only a mom can, “Thirty’s going to be your year, honey,” I was
pretty sure she was hoping I’d meet Mr. Right and start working on her
grandbabies. That, unfortunately,
didn’t happen, but in many ways thirty was my year. At thirty I was able to travel and study abroad, something I
never had the guts or money to do in my twenties. I also completed a novel and stopped seeing writing as a
hobby or a dream and started accepting it as a part of who I am equal to my
teaching career, even if it’ll never pay the bills as teaching does.
as I now start thirty-one, I could wonder what’s left (other than the whole Mr.
Right and grandbabies task), or worry that what the rest of my thirties has to
offer won’t be as exciting. But I
don’t. Because I’m facing my
thirties armed with a decade’s worth of wisdom and experience I didn’t have for
my twenties–funny how that happens, huh?
my twenties I was all about proving my independence. College degrees: check. Home-ownership: check.
Knowledge of small power tools after acceptance that the males in my
family weren’t much help: sorry, guys, but check. Despite all the support I had, I wanted to do as much on my
own as possible. I was my own
woman, an adult, capable of holding the door for myself, making my own
decisions, and making my own mistakes, thank you very much. And being too independent to ask for
help and advice at times, I made a few good ones, like putting grad school on
my credit cards, which seemed so smart when zero-interest offers were as
plentiful as shady mortgages. Ah,
the good ole days…luckily, they offer some guidance for the present.
our thirties we’ve proven, mostly to ourselves, we can make it on our own. But hopefully we’re smart enough to
realize we don’t have to, and sometimes it’s better if we don’t. Just because I’ve figured out a way to clasp
my bracelets without help (scotch tape one end to your arm), doesn’t mean I
wouldn’t appreciate having a friend or significant other do it for me. And sure, it’s comforting knowing I can
confidently make important decisions for myself, but it’s more so knowing I
have the supportive ear of family and friends, whose advice I’ve learned to
appreciate, whether or not I choose not to take it.
while I’m not about to foreclose on my independence in my thirties, I am
hopefully wise enough to accept interdependence is a better business plan. I don’t even need millions in
tax-payer’s bailouts to help me reform, though now that I’m all about accepting
help, I wouldn’t say no to someone paying off that grad-school debt.